Swimming With My Soul

Last night, I took my soul for a swim. We glided effortlessly up and down the lane, each push off the wall propelling us deeper into the unknown. What once required eleven strokes per lap now only took ten, sometimes even nine, as my body arched and stretched in new ways. With each reach and pull, I extended beyond my limits, discovering new depths within myself.

There is change afoot. I've rounded the corner, ready to forge ahead. Change was essential, stagnation had to end. Peace had to be made with what no longer worked. This is an immensely healthy alteration of course. With a clean slate, I've taken a leap of faith, consciously distancing myself from the past, even as I continue to grapple with it. Acknowledging this struggle is vital. I'm in the nascent stages, and momentum is gathering. To embrace new experiences and people, I must relinquish what no longer serves me.

I have moved beyond seeking external validation, to find the change within myself. This journey so far has been one of profound internal reflection. While my mind may at times deceive me, I am resolute that the past will not repeat itself. In due course, my mind will harmonize with my body's instincts. I will trust those instincts, listen to my heart, and allow my soul the freedom to explore. My soul has become my newfound partner. This shift in perspective is transformative, leading me to redefine my desires. Both the present and the future extend beyond the minutiae of today, embracing the scope of long-term planning.

I have given deep thought to the direction of my life and decided to let go of the elements from my past that have hindered my growth. In their place, I am choosing to embrace joy, filling any voids with new experiences and perspectives. I am determined not to dwell in unhappiness and instead allow my spirit the freedom to explore. Although embracing the unknown can be daunting, I am committed to breaking free from past patterns. I will take deliberate steps to focus on what truly matters to me and pursue what I genuinely love and value.

I'm in the process of figuring things out and gaining a clearer understanding of what's unfolding before me. If love does come into my life—and I genuinely yearn for it—it must be a mutual experience. In the past, love was never a one-way street for me.

I'm wholeheartedly embracing my passions and values, determined to leave behind false starts in favour of baby steps and stepping stones. By opening up to my capabilities and truly listening to my body—which has often guided me correctly—I am paving the way for faster growth. I'm learning to trust my instincts and step back from the trap of overthinking. The sunshine calls me and as they say, "Sunlight is the best disinfectant."

I'm taking my time, learning to trust my instincts while granting myself grace and understanding. I recognise the need to reflect and let my spirit venture into uncharted waters. These promised swims for my soul aren't merely metaphorical; they are profound journeys into my consciousness, unveiling treasures of insight and understanding.

I’m redefining love in its entirety—not just in the romantic sense, but also as self-love, and love for my journey and the process of becoming who I am meant to be. If love finds its way to me, it must resonate with my newfound values and aspirations. I seek a partnership grounded in mutual respect and understanding, where a shared vision for the future is the guiding force.

Yesterday was a day marked by small victories and profound moments of clarity and peace which gently steered me away from the shores of my past. Though challenges are sure to come, I am ready to face them with resilience and grace.

I am learning to be patient with myself, understanding that growth unfolds gradually. In times of self-doubt, I will remind myself of the progress  made and the strength gained. The words resonate within me: "Sunlight is the best disinfectant."